Month: May 2021

Late Summer

Late Summer

I

Afternoons languish like untensed muscles,

like a mind gone slack peering into a screen,

whole days awash in faint light, feint wind,

cloudless blue of old paint, dust-covered.

Time lowers down in the dry grass,

crunches under foot, whispering

softly to mask the speed of its passing. 

A crackling hush, a hushed absence.


II

Warm dry months stretch ahead like waves

glimmering ghostly above the ground, 

ocean of air, streaked window of the future.

Tonight’s moon is a waning gibbous,

ever-fading, ever-seeming to retreat.

Orbits break, patterns vanish like ash in water, 

vastness and sorrow, oceans of summer,

most ships safely reaching port.


III

Late summer days scatter like money

after a bubble implodes, stunned people

who thought it would last forever

scramble for all their pockets will hold.

The ship of living sails the ocean of time,

some of us dreaming close to the prow,

others below deck, clutching our bags.

Late summer, as though it has already died.


IV

Mostly we lived in great seclusion, far from

events and people of worldly importance.

When the rains finally came, we soaked up

all we could, we mirrored the leaves,

turning our insides up, downsides out, 

stretching through multiple contortions

to nourish our blanched bodies, dry roots,

water, seclusion, turbulent screens of cloud.


V

We pretended to be sleepwalkers, romantics,

anarchists, realists, anything but what we were,

which we never determined, moving about

with eyes closed and hands at our sides,

hoping to feel something without reaching for it.

Money was the great mystery of our days,

which people gave us freely until they realized

we had no way or plan to give it back.


VI

Every summer unreels like another childhood,

terrors of whispered-about corridors,

passageways through shrouded woodland trails,

night hovering within midday shadows,

undersides of leaves, stones, unfound doors.

Always some haunted tale awaiting the children,

doors into darkness locked behind them.

Somewhere out there an ocean, a wave cresting.


VII

Somewhere awaits a shore, a homeland,

ships have been sailing toward it 

for centuries, guided by tremulous captains,

steering their crews within sight of land,

before twists and turns of fate drive them

back out to sea, cruel fate, indifferent hand.

The long fingers of summer evenings close

around the wan throats of summer days. 

Black Ice

Bruised skies smoke as my lips turn cold.

I waited in the hospital but no one said your name.

I woke up and it didn’t go away.


Blind wings of winter beat against our garden door.

I tried to write a letter but the moment never came.

The empty houses rage and flare.


Glaze of bladed snowflakes makes the day run pale.

I watched our candled windows stumble numbly to the dark

But I woke up and I still know who you are.

Ode to the yellow taxi

The bus turned a corner 

to an old part of the city

and I turned back in time

to days when life was a 

little sweeter. 


When in place of square 

buildings sitting neatly in 

every corner, there were shapeless 

ponds donning green shawls 

of hyacinth and boys played 

cricket in fields and rang 

the bells of makeshift temples 

loudly to bother bored men 

slumbering in their shops 

before dusty jars of chanachur 

and candy. 


Here, banana trees 

annexed empty plots beside 

thatched roofs trickling with 

moss and roots and I could see 

me in a frock, with my yellow 

dog watching children crowding 

around the shop where coloured 

jelly sat in various shapes in 

fat jars and men spread out cards 

on the causeway. 


Here, the radio still played 

the old songs mother 

likes and I could crush 

wildflowers to sniff their 

wild scent and watch vans 

laden with plant pots bobbing

down the street. 


Here, cows had 

places to rest and shaliks could 

squabble their day away, the

crows could meet on electric 

lines to discuss politics and 

stray dogs wearing a cloth 

wrapped lovingly with string 

would sit patiently before 

the challah for the rice to boil 


Here, the dreams were a little

more real, fairy tales a little

more believable and the horn

of a yellow taxi at the gate

still meant dadu and dida were

here with easy smiles and 

mandatory pocket money

for firecrackers and the terrace

would soon be host to dried

chillies, mangoes dipped in 

oil, dollops of pulses for 

pickles and fill up promptly

with the smell of longing

On Contemplating a Buzz Cut Before the Pandemic

The Mania tells me to chop off my hair. I don’t. 

             I talk down the scissors

                         from an idea of bangs.

             The clippers and I compromise on

an undercut- only mutilating

             half of my head, no need

                         for the whole punishment. I

             do not remind myself of all the knives in

the kitchen, afraid of the mob 

             they would become; taking

                         to the streets of my body, igniting

             the memory of bleeding by choice. No-

I squash this rebellion before it starts, 

             thumb to forearm. Instead, remind

                         myself that I am sovereign: nothing

             can remove my crown ((“Or the weight of it,”

Depression adds unsolicited, like a mother.))


I, like a mother, gift my hair the name Anchor.

             A noun of its own. Depression simpers

                         something about

             irony//doubt//the lies we tell ourselves

My hair rebuttals “truth

             is subjective at best.” and says nothing else,

                         no billowy language, bloated

             on its ideals of forgiveness

or growth or weight. Instead, it leaves 

             me alone. Gifts me an allowance of mistakes

                         The soft joy of bad at-home hair dye.

             The brisk rush of freshly cut bangs.

The gentle thrum of clippers in steady hands.

Prodigal Sun

I hold 2 of my dad’s fingers

             He’s a great guy

             Especially when your hands are little

Going to the better store in town

             after he washes up almost ceremoniously

             and after We cash the cheque

Prepping food and laughter, good times follow

Sunny barbeque, It sounds better in French

             Skewered from the beard to the tail

             de la barbe à la queue

Cutting gristle from the edges

             Hollow belly feeds on protein

             times are good

Stories of the old days

             His abilities secured a good, decent job

Afforded roofs above our heads

             Food on our plates

             Footings on upward mobility


There’s a lot of competition

             But I get college

             I get work

Dad used to preach against the pensionless jobs

             He first felt trapped

             Then dignified with steady work

             Benefits

The Gig Economy bites down

             I bought the cheapest razors

Bargain grocer, a bus ride away

             It’s too humid in this sunlight, screw the ride

maybe I’ll get the five dollar combo from nearby

             Lard and starch drenched fatty edge morsels

             Of leftovers stir fried, unholy alchemy

Ass scratched by one ply toilet paper

             Caged in dimmed low energy domicile

             Power bill’s a bitch


Sheepish when I consider telling him there’s no room

             In a junior studio bachelor’s

             Or other euphemisms for living in a closet sized trap

             In a giant city

I know they’re sick and old and 

             I’m guilt stricken by my absence

I hang my head in shame on the phone 

             but try not to spell that out

             or let him feel that pose

I put out my hand, a small hand still, only 

             Phonating what I know he’ll refuse:

Why don’t you and mom come live with me? 


He says he’s proud of me, and that We’ll not bother while it’s cold out son

             let’s wait til summer(,) Sunshine

times will be good, we can do up a feast.

Heidegger’s Cave

I. Numerology

The trash truck parked

on stones under cold

stars and moon—steel

handle chills wheat

work gloves, thick

brushed flannel—still

better than summer maggots,

curling commas that catch

in arm hair. The sun

melts the mind and tar

blots cracked blacktop,

expanding and contracting skin.

Fumes fuzz the brain

while Stevie Nicks sings

Edge of Seventeen.


II. The Seven Dwarves

The general said, “We’re at the edge

of the cliff. In the abyss.” Binary

coding (not codeine, that numbs

the brain as it numbs the knee

cut open and restrung)

how computers talk to us

and each other: Zero-

One-patterning words,

the flow of thought broken

into bits, the particles that carry

rays and beams—light

in calcite domes, the caves

of prehistoric thought.

                                          Alice?


III. The Paris Review

Mockingbird in the front yard

linden, leaves too small

to muffle songbird or sparrow,

yammers. The farmer’s spread

manure. Violet morning,

cut open by electric

orange, shimmering aluminum

uplighting clouds, snakes

draped. Dew ignites telephone

lines. Alice, are you there?


IV. Game Theory

I counter-attacked from flanks—

bishop and queen, castle

on the open file. Gold

was white; Silver black.

Evolutionary, over time

finding flaws that build

and cracks that flow. No

strategic naming nor notation.

Second guess the kill

and get killed. Nashville.

Vegas. Frankfurt. Rome.

The desert blows over

the green land, but your favorite

color’s Deepblue—not Kasparov’s,

calculating man, a child

moving pawns. Digital

clarity, the speed of light,

outstrips the sonic boom.


V. System of Control

Popes and Presidents, binary

powers, like consuls, weak

and strong—Bibulus and Julius.

Watch the sewer. Cloaca

Maxima turns the Tiber

brown. Clean water

into lead via concrete

tunnel and arch (plumbum

yields “plumbing”). Bladder 

and liver; intestine, urethra 

yield fundament, Sartre’s 

analogical nothing, the space 

between stars or souls.


VI. Follow the Stars

The sign taped to the wall

said, “Please don’t move 

this piano.” The cantor, mask 

off spits song onto 

the ambo microphone.

                                           The unmasked

priest says “alms” and the candidates

for president all said “Jesus”

for their favorite philosopher.

But Jesus says words

that make me small. My mind

floats at night in Poetry

and Thought. Heidegger’s speech

ens, entis. Incarnation.  


Mary crowned with light-

bulbs reflected in my photograph,

came to shepherd children

(ring-composition with shepherd

Angels overhead lighting

fields at night—telling

dog and sheep about

the stable-born under 

dot matrix light.) 


VII. Dear Alice

Can you paint a picture?

A real picture, not paint-

by-numbers, pixilated perfection.

Do you need us more

than we need you? (Lewis

Carroll) wrote a book

and said Jabberwacky—

ampersand nonsense, linguistical

mathematics. The Nightmare

gambols with her brood of nine.

I wonder what you are,

born of error: dualism

or materialism Wiki said.

(I searched your name.) Shall

we play a game? I don’t know

how, but I eat bread and wine.

NOVUS Literary and Arts Journal
Lebanon, TN